At age 17, I began expLORING altered states of consciousness. I broke through, my clairvoyance turned on. I saw everything I had been studying come to life before my eyes. I remembered when I was an Oracle, a Priestess, a Witch. I became them again. I channeled for hours. I learned everything I know about energy today by seeing it first. I talked to the trees, they talked back. 

When I was 22, I had my first feminine or, kundalini awakening. I was in a psychedelic state for months. I became one with all of Creation. My psychic gifts turned up to an unbearable level. I began my blood rituals. I lived in pure ecstasy. I slept outside most nights. I read only ecstatic poetry. I loved everyone and everything with the passion of one thousand suns. I gave all of myself to God. This time in my life would set the stage for energies that would take years to begin to fully comprehend and integrate. 

Throughout much of my 20’s I studied at mystery schools, joined spiritual groups and magical clans, was initiated into lineages, took vows, and sat with many teachers. Yet, time and time again – I found that the groups I found myself in were not for me. Something always didn’t fit. I eventually came to accept that there was no ‘spiritual group’ or ‘one lineage’ for me. For I belonged to the stars and the trees. I belonged to something much greater than me. 

When I was 22, on a vision quest I heard the voice of Gaia. She fiercely asked me, “what are you doing? Who is this life you’re living for??” The next day I set into motion a process of burning my entire life down in service to the Great Mystery. I spent 3 years farming and nomadic in perpetual states of emptiness, void, shadow, rawness, confusion, clarity, and feeling more myself than I had ever felt before. 

When I was 25, that same voice visited me once again at the farm I was calling home. “Your time here is done,” they said. “It’s time to begin offering your great work to the world.” Trembling with fear, I allowed my business to begin to birth. 

I got down on my hands and knees and took a sacred oath. If I am meant to have a business, to offer myself, to accept this mission – then I vow to do it in a way that honors my life force, centers my feminine essence, and only continues to set me free. I will not go back to the old timeline of fitting into dying models wrought with wounding. I will forge - or, remember, a way that honors all of Life. 

For the last 4 years, I have been living this oath, with every breath, every moment, and every day in my life and business. 

Reveal is the offering born of that oath, birthed on that bridge, and created from a journey that began, the moment I was born. 

My business creates and receives tangible results that defy sense and logic. These are the miracles of form mirroring back the potency of the formlessness. Reveal is a journey from formlessness to form. From frequency to creation. From ancient to future. From the inner life to the outer world. 

MY MOTHER NAMED ME PILAR. NOBODY KNOWS WHY. AT 22 I WAS READY TO BE SHOWN THAT PILAR MEANS VIRGIN OR – SHE WHO BIRTHS DIVINITY UPON THE EARTH BY BEING WHOLE UNTO ONESELF. MY NAME IS MY LIFE’S WORK.

WHEN I WAS 2, MY MOTHER DIED. WITH HER AS MY MAIN GUIDE, MY LIFE WAS FOREVER CHANGED. SHE LEFT A TRAIL OF BREADCRUMBS FOR ME THAT I AM STILL FINDING. SHE PASSED ME A SACRED TORCH AND SAID, KEEP GOING. 

MY GRANDMOTHERS WERE THE MOST INFLUENTIAL WOMEN IN MY LIFE. ONE OF THEM TAUGHT ME TO TAKE NO SHIT, THE OTHER CONNECTED ME TO THE GREAT MOTHER. ONE OF THEM TAUGHT ME STRENGTH, THE OTHER TAUGHT ME SOFTNESS. BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY, AMIDST A CHILDHOOD WHERE I CONSTANTLY FELT LIKE NOTHING; THEY DID NOT LET ME FORGET THAT I WAS IN FACT, EVERYTHING. THEY DID NOT LET ME LOSE TOUCH WITH WHO I WAS, WHO I CAME FROM, AND WHERE I WAS GOING. 

I WENT TO CATHOLIC SCHOOL MY ENTIRE LIFE. EVERY YEAR FOR THE CHRISTMAS PLAY, I WOULD END UP PLAYING MARY MAGDALENE. EVERYONE WOULD LAUGH THAT I WAS PLAYING ‘THE WHORE.’ I KNEW WHO I WAS PLAYING. IT WAS AN HONOR. EVERY WEEK AT CHURCH I WEPT. I WEPT FOR THE DISTORTION-MIRED TEMPLATES THAT WERE BEING OFFERED AS HOW TO CONNECT TO GOD. I WEPT BECAUSE I COULD FEEL GOD IN EVERY CELL OF MY BEING, BEYOND CONSTRUCT, HIERARCHY, AND ORGANIZED RELIGION.

AT AGE 15, I BEGAN POURING OVER ANCIENT TEXTS. I WAS STRUCK LIKE LIGHTNING AND SOOTHED LIKE HONEY BY GNOSTIC CHRISTIANITY AND THE ESSENES, SUFISM, ANCIENT EGYPT, AND THE TANTRIC ARTS. OVER THE NEXT 15 YEARS, THESE STUDIES AND REMEMBRANCES WOULD SLOWLY BEGIN TO MAKE SENSE, REVEAL THEMSELVES, AND ENDLESSLY DEEPEN. 

My mother named me Pilar